{"id":2606,"date":"2022-10-20T15:34:07","date_gmt":"2022-10-20T15:34:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/?p=2606"},"modified":"2025-01-25T22:25:10","modified_gmt":"2025-01-25T22:25:10","slug":"12-stoic-rules-for-life-an-ancient-guide-to-the-good-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/12-stoic-rules-for-life-an-ancient-guide-to-the-good-life\/","title":{"rendered":"12 (Stoic) Rules For Life: An Ancient Guide to the Good Life"},"content":{"rendered":"

Rule 1: Own the morning<\/h2>\n

\u201cAt dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: \u2018I have to go to work \u2013 as a human being\u2026I\u2019m going to do what I was born for\u2026Or is this what I was created for? To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?\u2019\u201d\u00a0<\/i>\u2014 Marcus Aurelius<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

One of the most relatable moments in Marcus Aurelius\u2019s\u00a0Meditations<\/i>\u00a0is the argument Marcus Aurelius has with himself in the opening of book 5. It\u2019s clearly an argument he\u2019s had with himself many times, on many mornings\u2014as have many of us: He knows he has to get out of bed, but so desperately wants to remain under the warm covers.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s relatable\u2026but it\u2019s also impressive. Marcus didn\u2019t actually have to get out of bed. He didn\u2019t really have to do anything. One of his predecessors, Tiberius, basically abandoned the throne for an exotic island. Marcus\u2019s adopted great-grandfather Hadrian hardly spent any time in Rome at all. The emperor had all sorts of prerogatives, and here Marcus was insisting that he rise early and get to work.<\/p>\n

Why? It\u2019s because Marcus knew that winning the morning was key to winning the day and winning at life. He wouldn\u2019t have heard the expression that \u201cthe early bird gets the worm,\u201d but he was well aware that a day well-begun is half done. But it begs the question: what does winning the morning actually look like? What should one do after they wake up early? From the Stoics, we glean 3 habits that make the morning a success: Journal. Take a walk. Do deep work. Let\u2019s look at each of those individually:<\/p>\n

The Stoics were\u00a0big fans of journaling\u00a0(if you\u2019re a\u00a0Daily Stoic subscriber, you\u2019ve definitely heard us say that in an email or two). Epictetus the slave. Marcus Aurelius the emperor. Seneca the power broker and playwright. These three radically different men led radically different lives. But journaling\u2014they all had that habit in common. Marcus Aurelius\u2019s\u00a0Meditations<\/i>\u00a0consists of a collection of personal self-help notes, which he never intended to see the light of day.\u00a0 And Epictetus encouraged his students to write down their thoughts and reflect upon their actions everyday. The Stoic \u201ckeeps watch over himself as over an enemy lying in ambush,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

More recently, Oscar Wilde, Susan Sontag, W.H. Auden, Queen Victoria, John Quincy Adams, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Henry David Thoreau, Virginia Woolf, Joan Didion, John Steinbeck, Sylvia Plath, Mary Chestnut, Brian Koppelman, Ana\u00efs Nin, Franz Kafka, Martina Navratilova, Ben Franklin, and we\u2019ll stop there\u2014all journalers. And for good reason\u2014it works. There are few habits as\u00a0time-tested\u00a0and\u00a0researched-backed\u00a0as journaling. It clarifies the mind, provides room for quiet, private reflection, it gives one a record of their thoughts over time, it prepares you for the day ahead. There is no better way to start the day than with a journal.<\/p>\n

The Stoics sought stillness. It is with a still mind that one does their best work. The paradox is that perhaps the single best way to still one\u2019s mind is to put the body in motion. Runners and cyclists will tell you that this is true like an equation is true. That it is a fact. But you don\u2019t even have to go that far, or that hard, with your physical exertion to get what the Stoics were after. \u201cWe should take wandering outdoor walks,\u201d Seneca said, \u201cso that the mind might be nourished and refreshed.\u201d Take a walk in the parking lot before you head into the office. Take a walk around the neighborhood. Take a walk to the local coffee shop and back. By the time you\u2019re done, you\u2019ll be in the perfect headspace to…<\/p>\n

\u201cConcentrate on what\u2019s in front of you like a Roman,\u201d Marcus Aurelius wrote. \u201cDo it like it\u2019s the last and most important thing in your life.\u201d From his stepfather, Antoninus, Marcus learned how to work long hours\u2014how to stay in the saddle. He writes in Meditations that he admired how Antoninus even scheduled his bathroom breaks so he could work for long, uninterrupted periods. Ryan Holiday talks about how he does two to three hours of deep work first thing when he gets to his office. James Clear, author of the wonderful bestseller\u00a0Atomic Habits<\/i>,<\/i>\u00a0told us\u00a0on the Daily Stoic podcast\u00a0that he carves out \u201ctwo sacred hours\u201d in the morning to do his writing. That\u2019s it. \u201cI know it probably doesn\u2019t seem like a lot,\u201d Holiday explains, \u201cbut the Stoics knew that good work is realized by small steps. It\u2019s not a small thing, but good work is created in small steps.\u201d<\/p>\n

The day so easily gets away from us. Well-intentioned plans fall apart. Our willpower evaporates. So it\u2019s key that we prioritize the important things and it\u2019s key that we habitualize doing them early.<\/p>\n

Well-begun is half won. So get started.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Commit to waking up tomorrow 30 minutes earlier than you usually do. Decide what you are going to do with that extra 30 minutes (i.e. read, journal, exercise, meditate, etc.)<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 2: Only focus on what\u2019s in your control<\/h2>\n

\u201cThe chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control\u2026\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014 Epictetus<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The single most important practice in Stoic philosophy is differentiating between what we can change and what we can\u2019t. What we have influence over and what we do not.<\/p>\n

What does this look like in practice?<\/p>\n

Sports are a good example. An athlete can\u2019t control if the other team cheats or that refs always get the calls right. They can\u2019t control if people in the media know what they are talking about or if they stake out positions just to be controversial or contrarian. They can\u2019t control the weather or the conditions on the field.<\/p>\n

So what does that leave? One thing: their own performance. As Marcus Aurelius would say, it doesn\u2019t matter what other people say or think,\u00a0it only matters what you do.<\/i><\/p>\n

You control how you play.<\/em><\/p>\n

Not whether you win.<\/em><\/p>\n

You control how you play.<\/em><\/p>\n

Not if people respect you.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

You control how you play.<\/em><\/p>\n

Not if the crowd cheers you on.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

You control how you play.<\/em><\/p>\n

Focus on what\u2019s in your control. Nothing else.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/em>: Think for 5 minutes about your current problems and separate them into two categories: 1) what is in your control and 2) what is out of your control. Now only focus on what\u2019s in your control.\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 3: Don\u2019t suffer imagined troubles<\/h2>\n

\u201cWe suffer more from imagination than from reality.\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014 Seneca<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

What are you worried about right now?<\/p>\n

Your job?<\/p>\n

Your family?<\/p>\n

Your future?<\/p>\n

Your health?<\/p>\n

You\u2019re not crazy to worry. Bad things could happen related to any of them. A car accident. An economic downturn. A surprise diagnosis.<\/p>\n

But let\u2019s go backwards in time: a month, a year, five years ago. What were you worried about then? Mostly the same things, right?<\/p>\n

And how many of those worries came to pass? As Mark Twain quipped, quip: \u201cI am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.\u201d<\/p>\n

And even the ones that did come to pass\u2026clearly the worrying didn\u2019t help stop it, right?<\/p>\n

It was Seneca who put the best one-liner to this feeling: \u201cWe are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more from imagination than from reality.\u201d<\/p>\n

So \u201cwhat I advise you to do is,\u201d Seneca continued, \u201cdo not be unhappy before the crisis comes\u2026We are in the habit of exaggerating, or imagining, or anticipating, sorrow.\u201d Don\u2019t anticipate sorrow. Don\u2019t let anxiety and worry get the best of you. Don\u2019t let your worries grow out of proportion to what might actually happen. Don\u2019t let imagination overtake reality.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Next time you are feeling stressed or anxious, remind yourself: \u201cStay in the present. Focus on what you can control.\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 4: Treat success and failure the same<\/h2>\n

\u201cTo accept it without arrogance, to let it go with indifference.\u201d\u00a0\u2014 Marcus Aurelius<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Marcus Aurelius\u00a0had an interesting metaphor.<\/p>\n

He believed that a man, an emperor, a soldier\u2014everyone\u2014was like a rock. Throw the rock up in the air, he said, and \u201cit loses nothing by coming down and gained nothing by going up.\u201d The rock stays the same.<\/p>\n

We can imagine his own life mirror this analogy. He was an ordinary man\u00a0plucked by Hadrian\u00a0to become emperor. Yet he could have been equally dethroned at any moment as well (and late in his reign nearly was). Did this change who Marcus was? Did it mean he was better or worse than other people?<\/p>\n

No. He was still the same rock. And so are you. Whether you have a day that begins with a promotion or ends with a firing, you\u2019re the same. Whether you win the lottery or file for bankruptcy. Whether you address a crowd of thousands or have trouble getting your calls returned. The question is how we\u2019re going to respond to these swings of fate, if we can follow the lines of\u00a0Kipling\u2019s classic poem, \u201cIf\u2014\u201d:<\/p>\n

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster<\/p>\n

And treat those two impostors just the same;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

You\u2019re the same. Success or failure, highs and lows, they don\u2019t change you. They are outside you. These are indifferents. You stay the same.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Greet anything and everything that life throws at you today\u2014the highs and the lows\u2014the same way.\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 5: Just do one thing every day<\/h2>\n

\u201cWell-being is attained by little and little, and nevertheless is no little thing itself.\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014 Zeno<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Seneca wrote a lot of letters to his friend Lucilius. We don\u2019t know a lot about Lucilius, only that he was from Pompeii, he was a Roman knight, he was the imperial procurator in Sicily then its Governor, he owned a country villa in Ardea. For all his success though, we get the sense that he struggled with many of the things we all struggle with: Anxiety. Distraction. Fear. Temptation. Self-discipline.<\/p>\n

So it\u2019s good that he had a friend like Seneca, someone who cared about him, told him the truth, and gave him advice. One of the best pieces of advice from Seneca was actually pretty simple. \u201cEach day,\u201d he told Lucilius, you should \u201cacquire something that will fortify you against poverty, against death, indeed against other misfortunes, as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

One gain per day. That\u2019s it.<\/p>\n

This is the way to curbing our procrastinating tendencies: remembering that incremental, consistent, humble, persistent work is the way to improvement. Your business, your book, your career, your body\u2014it doesn\u2019t matter\u2014you build them with little things, day after day.<\/p>\n

Arnold Schwarzenegger is a filmmaker, entrepreneur, author, former Governor, professional bodybuilder, and father of five. He\u2019s also a fan of the Stoics and said\u00a0in a video\u00a0to people trying to stay strong and sane during the pandemic: \u201cJust as long as you do something every day, that is the important thing.\u201d<\/p>\n

Whether it\u2019s from\u00a0Seneca\u00a0or Arnold, good advice is good advice and truth is truth. One thing a day adds up. One step at a time is all it takes. You just gotta get one small win. And the sooner you start, the better you\u2019ll feel\u2026and be.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Pick a project you are either currently working on or wanting to get started. What is the smallest step you can take to move that project forward? Go complete that step!<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 6: Make beautiful choices<\/h2>\n

\u201cIf your choices are beautiful, so too will you be.\u201d \u2013Epictetus<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Epictetus\u00a0said that the root of beauty was beautiful choices.<\/p>\n

He was talking less of physical beauty, one imagines, than of true beautiful human behavior, but actually, it applies to both.<\/p>\n

A stunning woman whose looks are the result of her vanity and self-obsession will be rather unattractive when you get to know her. A man with strapping muscles acquired through steroids and a neglect of all other concerns is not really that impressive.<\/p>\n

Beauty, then, is difficult to separate from the intention, the choices which create it.<\/p>\n

So if you\u2019d like to look better, that gives you a good place to start\u2014in your choices but\u00a0also in your motivations and intentions. It\u2019s the decision to get out of bed early and go for a run\u2026 so you can be around to see your children grow up, not so you can look good in the mirror. Do your makeup because it gives you confidence, because the ritual of applying it is some quiet time to yourself\u2026 not to cover up your flaws. Hire a trainer because you want to learn the discipline of weightlifting or boxing\u2026 not because you just want someone to tell you what to do.<\/p>\n

Remember: The Stoics tried to separate\u00a0what was up to us and what wasn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

Things can get between you and your goal, of course, but nothing can stop you from getting started. Nothing can stop you from making a beautiful choice for yourself today.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Every time you are faced with a choice today\u2014between walking the 15 minutes or taking an Uber, between picking up the phone to have the difficult conversation or leaving it to an email, between taking responsibility or hoping it goes unnoticed\u2014choose the more difficult option, the option that challenges you the most.<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 7: Constantly ask, \u201cis this necessary?\u201d<\/h2>\n

\u201cAsk yourself at every moment, \u2018Is this necessary?\u2019\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014 Marcus Aurelius<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Now, unlike any other moment in recent memory, we are being forced to reevaluate things. We\u2019re looking at our jobs, at our finances, at the places we live. We\u2019re looking at so many of the systems that have been set up, whether they\u2019re governmental or cultural or familial. We\u2019re having to ask questions about why they are what they are, how they\u2019ve held up under the immense pressure and stress of this global pandemic.<\/p>\n

You can imagine Marcus Aurelius doing a bit of this himself. He too experienced a plague, and was forced to spend years far from Rome with the army. There, in his tent, he sat with his journal\u2014the pages that would become Meditations\u2014and he had a conversation with himself.<\/p>\n

One of the best passages survives to us and is worth applying to our own lives right now under similar stress and uncertainty:<\/p>\n

\u201cMost of what we say and do is not essential,\u201d he writes. \u201cIf you can eliminate it, you\u2019ll have more time, and more tranquility. Ask yourself at every moment, \u2018Is this necessary?\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

There has never been a better time to go through your life and ask yourself about all the things you do and say and think, \u201cIs this necessary?\u201d \u201cIs this essential?\u201d \u201cWhy am I doing this?\u201d \u201cWhat would happen if I changed?\u201d<\/p>\n

These are the questions to ask yourself, every day, every moment.<\/p>\n

How much or how little you work. Where you live. What your marriage or your relationships look like. The political policies you support. What you spend money on. What your goals are. The way your schedule is arranged. The things taking up room in your junk drawer\u2026or the thoughts running through your head.<\/p>\n

Most of what we do is not essential. Most of it is instinctual or it was foisted on us by someone else. Most of it isn\u2019t actually working for us. We might be better and happier if we changed.<\/p>\n

So remember Marcus\u2019s advice: \u201cIf you seek tranquility, do less.\u201d<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Take out a piece of paper and make two columns. On the left side, list out all of the things that are swirling in your mind and competing for your time and attention. On the right side, write \u201cit is necessary\u201d or \u201cit isn\u2019t necessary\u201d next to each item on the list. Then, cross out all the unnecessary items on the page and in your life.\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 8: Love your fate<\/h2>\n

\u201cDo not seek to have events happen as you want them but instead want them to happen and your life will go well.\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014 Epictetus<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The great German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche would describe his formula for human greatness as\u00a0amor fati\u2014a love of fate. \u201cThat one wants nothing to be different, not forward, not backwards, not in all eternity. Not merely bear what is necessary, still less conceal it\u2026.but love it.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Stoics were not only familiar with this attitude but they embraced it. Two thousand years earlier, Marcus Aurelius would say: \u201cA blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Stuff goes wrong. It\u2019s a fact of life. As\u00a0Seneca\u00a0said, Fortune behaves just as she pleases. His own life was proof of that. A health flare up disrupted his career. An emperor exiled him. He clawed his way back\u2026only to have it happen again.<\/p>\n

Nearly all of this was out of Seneca\u2019s control. The only part that was up to him was how he chose to see these events, and what he chose to do with them. He chose to see them as a good thing. He chose to use them. He chose to dye these events with his own color.<\/p>\n

Jocko Willink, in his famous viral speech, explains how we do this, how we can see everything that happens to us as good.<\/p>\n

Oh, the mission got canceled? Good\u2026 We can focus on another one.<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t get the new high-speed gear we wanted? Good\u2026 We can keep it simple.<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t get promoted? Good\u2026 More time to get better.<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t get funded? Good\u2026 We own more of the company.<\/p>\n

Didn\u2019t get the job you wanted? Good\u2026 Go out, gain more experience, and build a better resume.<\/p>\n

Got injured? Good\u2026 Needed a break from training.<\/p>\n

Got tapped out? Good\u2026 It\u2019s better to tap out in training than tap out on the street.<\/p>\n

Got beat? Good\u2026 We learned.<\/p>\n

Unexpected problems? Good\u2026 We have to figure out solutions.<\/p>\n

This is a Stoic prescription. This is the Stoic prescription. It\u2019s also the prescription for leadership, for entrepreneurship, for resiliency.<\/p>\n

Life throws stuff at you. You are the one who decides to lay down and let it bury you or to make hay out of it. You are the one who decides whether to bury your head in the sand and hope it goes away, or to look it square in the eye\u2014as bad as it is\u2014and say Good.<\/p>\n

These are your choices. And choosing rightly, choosing to see the bad things as ultimately good, is all you can do. It\u2019s what you must do. Because people are depending on you. Because you believe in your ability to make it good. Because you have but one life to live.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Today, whenever something \u2018bad\u2019 happens, respond to it with, \u201cGood.\u201d And then see how you can turn it into a positive.\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 9: Speak with the dead<\/h2>\n

The founder of Stoicism\u00a0Zeno\u00a0was a young man when he was given a cryptic piece of advice. \u201cTo live the best life,\u201d the Oracle told Zeno, \u201cyou should have conversations with the dead.\u201d<\/p>\n

What does that mean? Like with ghosts and goblins? Go spend time chatting in a cemetery?<\/p>\n

No, of course not. The Oracle was talking about reading. Because it\u2019s through books that we really talk to people who are no longer with us. Their bodies may be rotting in the ground, or long since turned to dust, but in the pages of a book, they are alive and well.<\/p>\n

Harry Truman was one of the greatest readers to ever occupy the White House. As a friend observed, to Harry \u201chistory was the men who made it, and he spoke of Marcus Aurelius or Henry of Navarre or old Tom Jefferson or old Andy Jackson as if they were friends and neighbors with whom he had only recently discussed the affairs of the day, their day.\u201d<\/p>\n

When Truman said\u00a0that \u201cnot all readers are leaders but all leaders are readers,\u201d we felt like he was talking to us. We built our\u00a0Daily Stoic Read to Lead Challenge\u00a0around that piece of advice from him, as if he was still here, not dead for nearly fifty years. That\u2019s the beauty and the power of books\u2014they can bring the past to life, they can annex, as Seneca said, all ages into your own.<\/p>\n

You can put yourself in the same room as\u00a0Lincoln. You can chat with\u00a0Shakespeare. You can be inspired by\u00a0Porcia Cato. To do this isn\u2019t scary, in fact it\u2019s the opposite. It\u2019s incredibly reassuring, because it means you have permanent access to the wisest men and women who ever lived.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s also an incredible opportunity to learn. To ask questions. To be taught. If there is anything at all scary about this, it\u2019s that millions of people decline to do this every day, day after day, for the balance of their natural lives. They reject this superpower. They decide to be illiterate. They ignore the dead, choosing to listen to the chattering voices on their television and their Twitter feed.<\/p>\n

Be smart, be brave, talk to the dead.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Read for thirty minutes today and everyday.<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 10: Be tough on yourself and understanding to others<\/h2>\n

\u201cBe tolerant with others and strict with yourself.\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014\u00a0Marcus Aurelius<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Cato hated excess. He hated finery. He hated luxury. He thought to indulge such things was weakness and stupidity. And so what did Cato think of his brother who was far less strict about these things? He loved him. In fact, he worshiped him.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important to remember: The Stoic has strict standards. We have strong opinions on what\u2019s right and what isn\u2019t. But\u2026and this is a big but\u2026we have to be understanding and forgiving of those who have been, as Marcus Aurelius writes, cut off from truth. This observation from\u00a0Marcus Aurelius\u2019s most thoughtful biography, by Ernest Renan, explains the right way to do it:<\/p>\n

\u201cThe consequence of austere philosophy might have produced stiffness and severity. But here it was that the rare goodness of the nature of Marcus Aurelius shone out in all its brilliancy. His severity was confined only to himself.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

That\u2019s exactly the key. Your standards are for you.<\/p>\n

Marcus\u2019s rule was to\u00a0be strict with yourself and tolerant with others.<\/i>\u00a0That\u2019s the line that Cato walked with his brother. That\u2019s what we have to figure out with the folks who, in today\u2019s world, live in a very un-Stoic way.<\/p>\n

There are consequences for their actions of course (especially when those actions or choices are unjust) but we don\u2019t need to cast them out of our lives or write them off as worthless or awful. We can still engage with them. We can see them at Christmas. We can let them into our lives in a way that is safe or respectful to our boundaries. We can accept that people can see things in a different way and let them live as they wish (again, so long as those choices aren\u2019t hurting other people).<\/p>\n

We can, to borrow an old expression, hate the sin while still loving the sinner. Because what they do, how they aect is not up to us. The good we choose to still see in them? That\u2019s in our control.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Next time you find yourself feeling disappointed with someone or on the verge of judging someone, stop yourself and instead, look for the good in them.<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 11: Turn obstacles upside down<\/h2>\n

\u201cOur inward power, when it obeys nature, reacts to events by accommodating itself to what it faces\u2014to what is possible. It needs no specific material. It pursues its own aims as circumstances allow; it turns obstacles into fuel. As a fire overwhelms what would have quenched a lamp. What\u2019s thrown on top of the conflagration is absorbed, consumed by it\u2014and makes it burn still higher.\u201d<\/i>\u00a0\u2014 Marcus Aurelius<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

One way to go through life is to turn away from the things that are hard. You can close your eyes and ears to what is unpleasant. You can take the easy way, forgoing difficulty whenever possible. The other way is the Stoic way\u2014it entails not only not avoiding hardship, but actively seeking it out.<\/p>\n

In the novel\u00a0Memoirs of Hadrian, Marguerite Yourcenar has Hadrian write to young\u00a0Marcus Aurelius\u00a0about his philosophy for learning and benefiting from all of life\u2019s adversity and unpleasantness. \u201cWhenever an object repelled me,\u201d he says, \u201cI made it a subject of study, ingeniously compelling myself to extract from it a motive for enjoyment. If faced with something unforeseen or near cause for despair, like an ambush or a storm at sea, after all measures for the safety of others had been taken, I strove to welcome this hazard, to rejoice in whatever it brought me of the new and unexpected, and thus without shock the ambush or the tempest was incorporated into my plans, or my thoughts. Even in the throes of my worst disaster, I have seen a moment when sheer exhaustion reduced some part of the horror of the experience, and when I made the defeat a thing of my own in being willing to accept it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Of course, this is fiction so Hadrian never said such a thing. But clearly somebody taught Marcus a lesson along those lines,\u00a0because Meditations is filled with similar passages. Marcus writes about how a fire turns everything that is thrown into it into flame. He says that obstacles are actually fuel. \u201cThe impediment to action advances action,\u201d he writes, \u201cwhat stands in the way becomes the way.\u201d<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a beautiful way to approach the world\u2014and ultimately, the only one suited for our unpredictable and stressful times. Take someone like Laura Ingalls Wilder, who had a hardscrabble existence. From the Kansas prairies to the backwoods of Florida, she and her family eked out a life from some of the most unforgiving environments on the planet. She endured\u2014and eventually thrived\u2014despite this, due primarily to her Stoic optimism. \u201cThere is good in everything,\u201d she later wrote, \u201cif only we look for it.\u201d<\/p>\n

To avoid difficulty would mean complete retreat from life. It would mean hiding in ignorance. Worse, this would make you dreadfully vulnerable to crisis if it did ever find you. Instead, we must strive\u2014as Hadrian said\u2014to welcome hazard. We can rejoice in the unexpected and even turn failure into something by deciding to own it. We can learn from unpleasantness and even soften our aversions.<\/p>\n

This will not be easy. But that\u2019s fitting, isn\u2019t it? We are not naturally attracted to obstacles\u2026which is precisely why we must work on finding out how to like them.\u00a0This is the way.<\/i><\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/em>: Face today in the spirit of Laura Ingalls Wilder\u2014look for the good in everything.<\/i><\/p>\n

Rule 12: Remember: you are dying every day<\/h2>\n

\u201cThis is our big mistake: to think we look forward toward death. Most of death is already gone. Whatever time has passed is owned by death.\u201d \u2014\u00a0Seneca<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It\u2019s easy to see death as this thing that lies off in the distant future. Even those of us who choose not to live in denial of our mortality can be guilty of this. We think of dying as an event that happens to us. It\u2019s stationary\u2014whatever date it will happen at\u2014and we\u2019re moving towards it, slowly or quickly, depending on our age and health.<\/p>\n

Seneca felt\u00a0that this was the wrong way to think about it, that it was a mistaken view that enabled many bad habits and much bad living. Instead, he said, death was a process\u2014it was happening to us right now. We are dying every day, he said. Even as you read this email, time is passing that you will never get back. That time, he said, belongs to death.<\/p>\n

Powerful, right? Death doesn\u2019t lie off in the distance. It\u2019s with us right now. It\u2019s the second hand on the clock. It\u2019s the setting sun. As the arrow of time moves, death follows, claiming every moment that has passed. What ought we do about it? The answer is live.\u00a0Live while you can. Put nothing off. Leave nothing unfinished. Seize it while it still belongs to us.<\/p>\n

Put it into practice<\/i>: Spend five minutes meditation on your mortality, on how brief your existence is. Then, as Marcus Aurelius would say, let the thought of your mortality determine everything you do and say and think.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Rule 1: Own the morning \u201cAt dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: \u2018I have to go to work \u2013 as a human being\u2026I\u2019m going to do what I was born for\u2026Or is this what I was created for? To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?\u2019\u201d\u00a0\u2014 Marcus Aurelius One of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8924,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[38],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2606","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stoicism"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/marcus.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2606","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2606"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2606\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8925,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2606\/revisions\/8925"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8924"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2606"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2606"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pmascience.com\/pma\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2606"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}